The advert for natural beauty......

It's rare that you say this, but you've had your mind blown, by what feels like a nuclear bomb. She's intelligent, bright, curvacious, bubbly, confident and polite. To be completely honest, Shona Collins is a walking, talking, smiling advert for natural beauty.

You thought she would win as soon as you first heard her speak and saw her smile, you were right.

'I love my curves and freckles.'

She should, they are amazing.

God be with them.......

It's raining and cold, your clothes are soaked through, you can feel the water on your skin. You've had a total of four hours sleep in the past three days, you're tired, run down, you see things moving around you, when there isn't anything there. It was light when he approached, he came from the bushes to your right, Mike saw him first, he shouted to you and warned you about what was coming. The figure came towards you, walking slowly, his hands held in the air, he was saying something you couldn't understand. You had no idea what to do, so you shouted at him to stand still, he didn't stop, he kept coming towards you. At this point he lowered one of his arms, and pointed something at you, you couldn't see it properly, it looked like a gun. You started to scream at him to stop and stand still, but he didn't. As he got within five metres of you, you made your weapon ready to fire, you screamed again, your mouth dry, but he didn't stop, you pressed the safety catch, got into the kneeling position and fired, one, two, three, four, five shots. He fell to the ground.

It is easy to sit in an arm chair and make a decision based on hindsight, it is convenient to see the morals of the situation, in a warm court room after a coffee break. If a suspected suicide bomber approaches a vehicle check point, a soldier has only seconds to decide whether or not to open fire.

'My sincere regrets. I cannot begin to put myself in the position that they are faced with. I am a family man myself.'

CO19 Firearms Officer C12

Until people have been in a situation for real they should never pass judgement, spin theories or condemn those who have the courage to stand up and place themselves in the position where life and death is decided in seconds. You have no idea what you would do if you faced the situation for real, if you found yourself in the scenario you have trained for, you hope and pray you would do the right thing, but you just don't know.

'If I did not act, members of the public would be killed, colleagues would be killed. I would be killed. I had a duty to protect the public.'

CO19 Firearms Officer C12

One character trait that makes you angry is the one of the 'Armchair critic', if people want to make judgement on brave men and women, they should first stand up, take an oath, be counted, and face the situation.

'I'm responsible for the death of an innocent man. Something I have to live with all my life.'

CO19 Firearms Officer C12.