Actions defined by thought......

A while ago as you were on your way to ASDA you stopped at a set of traffic lights in your car, at a major junction, and the gentleman next to you was speaking on his phone, rolling back and forth to the white line, also he was operating his car radio. At this point you signaled to him politely with your hands to get off his phone and concentrate on the road, followed by a thumbs up from you he proceeded to mouth 'Fuck Off', not his best move of the day.

At this point you thought about just letting it go, which you decided to do, after all, it wasn't the crime of the century and as you were in your car there wasn't really much you could do. But as you both drove away you seemed to be going in the same direction. All the way to ASDA.

Then you did something rather stupid, you made a point of parking right next to him, and making sure you got out of your car at the same time as him, the conversation went something like this:

'Excuse me mate, don't use your phone while you're driving it's dangerous.'

'I can do what the hell I want to do, fuck off!'

'I beg your pardon?'

'You heard what I said.'

'Yes I heard it loud and clear, don't swear at me.'

'What you gonna do about it?'

At this point you really wanted to walk away, your girfriend was in the car and she certainly didn't need to see you getting your arse kicked by some idiot, but you made the decision that walking away wasn't really an option. You told her to lock her door and stay in the car. You remember exactly what you said next, you have no idea why you do, it's just burned onto your memory:

'Actually mate, i'm a copper, and if you want three points, a sixty pound fine and to be arrested for a Section 4 Public Order Offence, carry right on being an idiot.'

At this point his face changed completely, he looked like a kid, like he had been caught masturbating by his mother, a mixture of embarassment, and complete and utter terror. He started explaining many things at once, apologising profusely and trying to back track over the past five minutes of his life. After being given a few stern words of advice, he got in his car and left.

After taking your girlfriend home, you managed to get a few seconds to browse the news, a young Police Officer had been beaten up by a gang of youths earlier that day, whilst he was off duty trying to stop them behaving badly on a bus. It didn't sit well, and you promised yourself that never again would you get involved.........

Have you kept that promise? Well, is the sky yellow?

'The real world: no time to do it right, but always time to do it over.'

Rex Jaeschke